Last night, after one of my dad’s and my monthly in-depth conversations, a line from a song popped into my head… These are ever changing times.
And indeed they are.
One moment you think, this is it, the way the core entities that make up my life will be. But then, without you even noticing, those core entities start swopping themselves around and some are even replaced. And suddenly, one day, when you stand back to take a look at the way your life is set up, the landscape has changed once again.
What lies before me now gives me a sense of comfort and a dash of giddiness, whereas before when I looked out over the planes of this landscape all I felt was hesitation and trepidation.
I’m not saying my life was wrong in the past. I definitely needed to go through that phase, and grow through it to be able to stand at this precipice with the utmost gratitude, fervour and implicit knowledge that this is exactly how things should be right now.
We’ve only just entered the fourth month of the year, but already I have garnered a lifetime worth of lessons. And all it took was for me to take a step back and realise I do not need to react to every single little thing that comes whooshing through my days – especially situations ignited by others. I’ve learnt that not every situation or person needs a reaction, but that I should acknowledge what is happening and keep my eyes and mind open for the lesson to make itself known.
After my conversation with my father I also realised that for the most part I have been my own oppressor when it came to a certain aspect of my life. Because I either consciously or subconsciously repeatedly allowed myself to be made out to be less than. I constantly allowed myself, my identity and my ethics to be ridiculed by others, and I thought this was how things were supposed to be. The thing is, it is okay to be selfish in protecting oneself. And by that I literally mean protecting all the million little parts that make one up.
We cannot still be expected to endure certain actions or situations just to appease those around us. In doing so we only compromise our own integrity and self-worth.
For the most part I am grateful for the change in pace. I am grateful that, for the most part, this next phase of my journey has been scenic. We get so caught up in our lives and so used to things we don’t always realise what we are missing. We forget life can be far more colourful than the metered doses we are fooled into accepting from others.
It is important that we aggressively encourage ourselves to take back our power we’ve left on the floor far too many times. And it doesn’t matter if it offends anyone because your innermost workings do not need their permission to flourish in their own weird way.
Celebrate yourself without seeking permission or validation from others, directly or indirectly.
The last thing I learnt from our conversation is that no matter how old you are, always listen to your parents.
