More than 30 years after apartheid ended South African families still struggle to talk to their young children about the oppressive regime’s intergenerational trauma.

A new collaborative study involving researchers from the University of the Western Cape (UWC), the University of the Free State (UFS) and the University of Missouri in the US shows that many families avoid initiating conversations about apartheid’s psychological and emotional impact with children born after democracy. Instead, they wait for their children to ask questions or express curiosity before raising the difficult subject.

The study, published in the Journal of Family Communication, explored how South African parents from different racial backgrounds speak to their children about apartheid, and found that families use a range of approaches to explain one of the country’s most painful chapters.

Researchers interviewed 22 parents representing all four racial groups classified under apartheid, namely black, white, coloured and Indian.

The researchers included PhD candidate Tessa Goldschmidt of the Department of Psychology at UWC, Prof Haley Kranstuber Horstman of the University of Missouri, US-based independent scholar Olivia Watson, senior lecturer Prof Diana Breshears of the UFS, and independent researcher Dr Athena Pedro.

Intergenerational trauma

The study argues that although apartheid was abolished in 1994 its legacy continues to shape South African society, with families having to navigate its historical trauma across generations. Researchers said this intergenerational trauma could have lasting mental, physical and relational effects, including increased uncertainty, stress and anxiety as well as family dysfunction in subsequent generations.

One parent, a black woman, refrained from discussing apartheid with her young children and had no intention of doing so. The rest of the parents reported that they discussed apartheid with their children to some degree. Most did so in response to something their children had said, heard or experienced.

These conversations were generally unplanned, with various external events, such as discussions at school, prompting them. Sometimes children personally experienced racism and told their parents, who then helped them make sense of the experience.

Four approaches

Four approaches emerged during discussions: responding, empowering, shielding and recognising progress.

Some parents took a responsive approach, answering only when their children asked. These parents waited for their children to express curiosity about apartheid or something they had learned at school or seen in the media. These discussions were often shaped by the child’s age and level of understanding.

Others focused on empowering their children. These parents believed it was important for young people to understand the injustices of apartheid so they could develop empathy, appreciate diversity and contribute to building a more equal society. By sharing family experiences and historical facts, they hoped their children would learn from the past rather than repeat it.

A third group adopted a shielding approach, trying to protect their children from the emotional pain associated with apartheid by limiting how much they shared and delaying these conversations until they believed their children were mature enough to process them. For some families, the trauma of apartheid remained deeply personal, making these discussions particularly difficult.

Most parents emphasised recognising progress. While they acknowledged the lasting effects of apartheid they also encouraged their children to appreciate how far South Africa had come since the transition to democracy. These conversations often focused on hope, reconciliation and the importance of working together to create a better future.

Shaping the next generation

Researchers said the different approaches highlighted the important role families played in shaping how younger generations understood history. Conversations at home could influence how children made sense of identity, race, fairness and belonging long after they had learnt about apartheid in the classroom.

”These findings deepen scholarly and practical understanding of intergenerational family conversations about historical events, particularly those involving racial discrimination,” the researchers said. They noted that storytelling could help families have honest, age-appropriate conversations that acknowledged painful experiences while fostering hope and empathy and equipping young people to help build a more inclusive future.

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