Ek sit nog so om my hele pedigree<\/i> vir hulle te vertelle toe \u2019n man op die toneel verskyn. <\/p>\n
Klaarblyklik was hy ook daar om, soos ek, drie lewens te red.<\/p>\n
Ek steur my vir eers nie aan hom nie en gaan voort om die vraelys te beantwoord. Soos: Gaan jy binne die volgende 24 uur aan \u2019n gevaarlike sportsoort deelneem? Nee wat, om uit \u2019n vliegtuig te spring is nie vir my nie, so, dis \u2019n nee. En ek steek ook nie mes nie, al is dit die Nuwe Suid-Afrika se \u201cnasionale sport\u201d.<\/p>\n
Die gryserige man kom sit reg oorkant my. Net voordat ek die vraag kan beantwoord oor of ek dalk swanger is, tref dit my: maar dis mos Pietie Human, vanmelewe die dorp se hoofverkeersman, sekerlik nou al afgetree. Pietie Liefde, het ons klomp matriekseuns hom altyd genoem.<\/p>\n
En nee, ek is nie swanger nie. Was nog nooit nie en sal ook nooit wees nie. Ook \u2019n nee.<\/p>\n
\u201cHallo,\u201d s\u00ea ek, \u201cis jy nie dalk Pietie Human nie?\u201d Nou moet ek fyntrap, want 30 jaar of wat doen dinge aan \u2019n mens en dalk is dit nie eens hy nie. Alles sak mos maar mettertyd af.<\/p>\n
Het jy die afgelope drie maande met meer as een mens uhm\u2026jy weet? Nee, ek doen nie daai nie. En toe meteens: \u201cDis ek ja, Pietie Human.\u201d<\/p>\n
Sowaar, dit \u00eds toe nou hy.<\/p>\n
Terwyl ek voortgaan met die vraelys, val dit my skielik by. \u201cJa, ou Pietie, jy het ons mos toe ons in matriek was met jou Datsun-verkeersbakketjie rondgejaag om die ouens uit te vang wat sonder lisensie ry, n\u00e9?\u201d <\/p>\n
Het jy die afgelope sewe dae Botox-behandeling ondergaan? Wel, ek beplan vir \u2019n facelift<\/i> oor so tien jaar van nou af. So die antwoord is nee.<\/p>\n
Pietie gee \u2019n goedige laggie en loer nou na my oor sy Clicks-brilletjie wat ook al by 3.5 verby is. \u201cMaar julle was darem \u2019n klomp bliksnaters,\u201d s\u00ea hy, \u201cen meer glibberig as \u2019n paling.\u201d Want sien, hy het ons selde gevang. \u2019n 50cc- Honda Bobcat van daai tyd kon nogal \u2019n Datsun 1200 ore aansit.<\/p>\n
Het jy die afgelope weke tatoe\u00ebring ondergaan? Wel, nee, ek skryf meestal op papier, nie op my vel nie.<\/p>\n
\u201cMaar Pietie, h\u00e9t jy ooit een van ons gevang?\u201d \u201cJa,\u201d seg hy, \u201ctog wel een keer.\u201d \u201cEn toe?\u201d vra ek. \u201cDit was my Christelike plig om hom by die skoolhoof aan te gee en sy motorfiets daar en dan te konfiskeer.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cJa, en toe?\u201d Hy kyk weg en ver, nes wanneer \u2019n donkie oor \u2019n afstand \u2019n nuwe hek sien. \u201cToe help die seunskind my nog om die motorfiets op die bakkie te kry. Ek het dit toe maar by sy pa se kantoor gaan aflaai en gevra hy moet asseblief \u2019n lisensie kry. Volgende keer is daar \u2019n vet boete.\u201d<\/p>\n
\u201cNou waar was jy, Pietie, toe \u2019n buurman in ons kompleks knaend sy motor in m\u00fd garage kom parkeer en die deur gesluit het? Dan was hy baie verle\u00eb as ek hom daarop wys dat sy garage eintlik die een aan die oorkant is.\u201d<\/p>\n
Maar wag, nou kan ons gaan bloed skenk. Ek en ou Pietie, nou bloedbroers. <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
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