{"id":297667,"date":"2026-03-12T13:49:35","date_gmt":"2026-03-12T11:49:35","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/novanews.co.za\/noordkaapbulletin\/?p=297667"},"modified":"2026-03-12T13:49:36","modified_gmt":"2026-03-12T11:49:36","slug":"narsisme-5-tweedehands-opgewonde-sonder-enige-blydskap","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/novanews.co.za\/noordkaapbulletin\/narsisme-5-tweedehands-opgewonde-sonder-enige-blydskap\/","title":{"rendered":"NARSISME 5 | ‘Tweedehands opgewonde’ sonder enige blydskap"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Hiermee die vyfde aflewering van ‘n reeks wat ‘n Noord-Kapenaar oor die lewe saam met ‘n narsistiese ma geskryf het<\/strong>. Vir die vorige aflewerings, besoek “Opinion<\/a>” op NoordkaapBulletin <\/em>se webwerf. <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ek is in die laerskool. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My ma stap opgewonde by my kamer in. Sy sit ‘n donkergrys papiersak op die bed neer en begin dit oopvroetel.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In die papiersak is ‘n juweelkissie. Vandat ek kan onthou wil ek ‘n juweelkissie h\u00ea \u2013 ‘n pienk een met ‘n fyn ballerina en ‘n pragtige deuntjie. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Die juweelkissie wat my ma te voorskyn bring is geel met ‘n poppie wat my aan Heidi laat dink, maar dit is ook mooi. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Dit is vir jou verjaarsdag volgende week!” \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

My ma is baie opgewonde. Sy laat my ‘n oomblik daarna kyk en b\u00eare dit weer in die sakkie. By die deur draai sy om. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Onthou, jy sien dit met jou verjaarsdag vir die tweede keer vir die eerste keer.” \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ek knik my kop. Dan stap sy na hul kamer om my geskenk toe te draai.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

‘n Paar maande n\u00e1 my agtiende verjaarsdag kom my pa tuis na werk. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Kom, bring vir my die rooi motor se sleutel, ons moet iewers heen ry.” \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dit is ‘n vreemde versoek. My pa lyk geheimsinnig. Ek gryp die sleutel van die hoedestaander af en stap buitentoe. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

“Wag vir my, ek ry ook saam,” s\u00ea my ma toe ek die agterdeur toetrek.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Toe ek en my ma die motorhuis se deur toedruk, fluister sy: “Ons gaan vir jou jou eerste motor koop!” \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

‘n Opgewondenheid spoel deur my hele wese. Voordat ek iets kan s\u00ea of doen, s\u00ea my ma: “Maar jy hoor dit vir die tweede keer vir die eerste keer.” \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Die opgewondenheid dreineer uit my lyf en versamel in ‘n onsigbare poeletjie voor die motorhuis. Ek stap emosieloos terug motor toe. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dit is die patroon van my verjaarsdae en Kersfees en enige ander tyd wat iets met ‘n geskenk te doen het. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\n

Keer op keer het sy die geskenk vir my gegee en dan teruggevat. Elke keer moes ek maak asof ek dit vir die eerste keer sien. <\/h4>\n<\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Vir enige mens sal dit verwarrend wees, maar as jy so iets leer vandat jy ‘n kleuter is, raak dit normaal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ek het my pa altyd jammer gekry. Hy was opreg opgewonde omdat ek opreg opgewonde was. Wat hy nie geweet het nie, is dat dit net tweedehandse opgewondenheid aan my kant was. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In die poging om heeltyd in beheer te wees, gun narsiste jou niks. Niks. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hulle is so selfgesentreerd dat hulle hul slagoffers van basiese emosies en enige spontaniteit ontneem. \n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Die onsigbare dekmantel wat oor emosionele mishandeling hang maak dat slagoffers nie herken of gehelp word nie. Jy moet self probeer oorleef.\n<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ek skryf oor hierdie littekens wat ek in my hart ronddra om ‘n fisiese bewys te h\u00ea van ‘n lewe wat ek nie wou leef nie. As dit iemand kan help om uit die wurggreep van narsisme<\/a> weg te breek, soveel beter.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Keer op keer het sy die geskenk vir my gegee en dan teruggevat. Elke keer moes ek maak asof ek dit vir die eerste keer sien. 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