The late American singer Gwen Guthrie unapologetically said: “No romance without finance, you’ve got to have a job if you want to be with me. Boy, nothin’ in life is free.”
This is in her popular hit song “Ain’t nothin’ goin’ on but the rent” from her album titled Good to Go Lover, released in 1986.
Guthrie’s lyrics accentuate the fact that finances play a critical role in relationships – marriages, and even keeping the flame of Valentine’s Day burning this February.
In fact, the sensitivity around finances in relationships has proven overwhelming. American artist Ralph Tresvant said, “Money can’t buy you love”, and Blackstreet, “Money can’t buy me love.”
With finance highlighted as a key enabler to a memorable Valentine’s Day, Charnel Collins, chief executive officer (CEO) of National Debt Advisors, strongly warns against neglect by partners to discuss debt in relationships.
This followed findings that financial problems contribute to 20% to 40 % of divorces in the world.
“It is alarming that four out of every ten divorced couples cite financial strains for their demise.
“Amidst the roses and chocolates, the topic of debt in relationships is often left undiscussed. Debt is not only a financial challenge, but a significant threat to the very fabric of relationships.
“The pressure and conflicts that arise from managing debt can unveil deeper issues such as secrecy about spending and disagreements on financial management, creating a ripple effect that extends beyond just the numbers on a statement,” said Collins.
She has encouraged couples to share personal financial experiences regularly and pose direct questions about debt and stress the significance thereof.
“This can help couples understand the severity of the situation, and how it might affect their own finances is crucial. When it comes to discussing finances, the key is open communication without judgment. It is about finding the courage to be vulnerable and sharing our thoughts on spending and saving.”
Collins has discouraged couples from making debt a relationship deal-breaker.
“In many cases, debt might not significantly impact a couple until they consider moving in together. Setting ground rules around debts and bills, and establishing open communication channels, can help mitigate potential issues,” said Collins.
Collins offers the following do’s and don’ts.
Do
- Set financial goals. Shared financial aspirations create a foundation of trust and enhance overall financial stability in a relationship.
Financial stability is attainable through mindful spending, effective saving, and responsible investment practices.
- Follow a set budget. Establishing and sticking to a budget is a fundamental practice in a relationship. It ensures that expenses are in harmony with income, preventing unnecessary financial strain and promoting financial security for both partners.
Don’t
Neglect saving. A lack of saving can lead to financial stress and strain the overall well-being of the relationship.- Hide personal debt: Managing personal debt is crucial before a relationship becomes serious.
- Continue bad spending habits. Avoid impulsive purchases, and practice budget management.
